Tips For Easing Wedding Day Anxiety
You are getting married! A moment you have been dreaming of possibly your entire life it is really exciting. With the wedding planning comes a whole whirl wind of emotions and feelings that range from happiness to major stress.I wanted to blog about this because I am someone who experiences anxiety and was married a couple years ago. It was one of the most beautiful days of my life, but days leading up to the wedding day and the wedding morning were filled with a ton of stress. Before I go on I want to say I AM NOT A THERAPIST, OR EXPERT ON MENTAL HEALTH. I do not have any credentials and you know yourself better than anyone else so please don’t see these tips as the end all be all.
As a Wedding Photographer of nearly 10 years and a past bride I have gained some knowledge and insight and wanted to share with any future couples out there who struggle with anxiety. The morning of my wedding I woke up like a ton of bricks…. I felt tired, sick to my stomach, and like I might not make it to my wedding. My now husband had to take care of me the morning of because I felt physically awful and I now know it was anxiety taking over. I finally made it to the getting ready room with my bridesmaids and I felt like I was floating out of my body. I was so anxious and I did not even realize how nervous I was until the day of my wedding. I had a really hard time enjoying the morning which really made me sad because I wanted that time with my friends and family to be special and calm. Fast forward to finally seeing my husband, the nerves started to get better and after the ceremony I was feeling a lot more calm. I was having an amazing time dancing with friends and feeling all the love around me but I will not lie to you I was so exhausted and drained.
Now that some time has passed and I have a better hold on my mental health I want to share some tips that helped me on my wedding day and some things I think would have been really beneficial to me then and some things that I hope help you take good care of yourself on this special day.
1.Get real with yourself.
Checkin in with yourself, are you someone that likes being center of attention or someone who gets nervous in front of crowds? Do you experience anxiety regularly?Are you going to feel happier having a smaller wedding? Once you ask yourself these things you can really cater to your own needs and make them a priority and take good care of yourself. This is something I wish I would have paid more attention to.
2.Pick your team wisely.
Weddings are such a personal day, you should really only hire people that you trust and feel comfortable with. One person that will be around you the most the day of your wedding is your photographer. I remember when my photographer arrived I felt so at ease and taken care of knowing she was there, she had a great calming energy. So get to know your vendors before booking with them it makes a huge difference in your experience.
3.Protect your energy.
It’s your day and your partner’s you should only have people around you that truly want the best for you and who have your back. Especially the morning of, be very selective on who you are around and who you are NOT around…. make sure your wedding party or family members who are with you are people who are calming, loving, and will make you laugh. I was very strategic on this and it made me feel so much better to have people I could lean on and make me laugh in the process. Another piece of this is to be honest with your loved ones about your mental health and do not be afraid to ask for help. They are there to support you.
4.Don’t party too hard the night before.
Most couples will have their rehearsal dinners the night before or some sort of welcome event for guests. This is such a fun part of the wedding and I loved it but limit your alcohol intake. And for god’s sake attempt to go to bed at a reasonable hour. This will make a huge difference on how you feel the next day.
5.Prioritize Self Care.
This is a big one. This was something I really did not do much of and I really wish I would have. Self care is sort of a buzz word these days and it means something so different for everyone. I would encourage you months before your wedding and in life in general to find what makes you feel good,calm, and centered. For me that is yoga, deep breathing, being in nature, takings walks, cutting out caffeine, going to therapy. Practice these things around your wedding and I think it could make a huge difference in how you feel.
6. Consider A First Look.
If you have not considered doing what is called a “first look” on your wedding day I highly suggest it and here is why. If you are someone who gets really anxious it can make you feel a lot calmer to see your partner before all the wedding craziness begins. It is a special moment between just the two of you (and your photographer) where you can see each other in your wedding attire before the ceremony. Your photographer will capture this quiet but intimate moment of the two of you with all the feels before walking down the aisle. It might be one of the only moments throughout the day where it is only you two. Another perk is you are able to get some nice photos of you both which can leave more wiggle room in the wedding day timeline to get photos done, another stress reliever. I did a first look and it was one of my favorite moments of our wedding.
7. Ground yourself.
One thing about anxiety is that it wants control… it wants to know the outcome of a certain event and wants to be able to predict what will happen. You have spent so much time and energy planning this special day it makes complete sense that you want it to be perfect and amazing. But this is where you HAVE GOT TO LET GO and ENJOY IT. The day is here, you have put all the wheels in motion, you have hired people to help take care of you. Now you have to just be in the moment and realize as wonderful as this day is, it is only the beginning of your journey together. There is a saying that “ it is not about the wedding it is about the marriage” and I truly believe that. Little things may go wrong on the day of, and that is totally normal and ok and guess what nobody will even notice those things. What people remember about weddings is the feeling, the love, the human-ness. Just know it is going to be beautiful no matter what.
I hope some of these tips help you get started on taking care of yourself and your partner.There is nothing wrong with having anxiety and we need to get rid of the mental health stigma and talk about it. If you have any questions for me or are looking into my wedding services follow this link Contact me
Thank you for reading.
